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Scott: We'll get to the specials, but first, I need to tell you... I'm gay.
Peter: The hell you are! No waiter of mine is gonna be gay!
Lois: Peter, please. He's our waiter. He's the only waiter we have.
Peter: Lois, our waiter is dead to us. We have to focus all our attention on our hostess now.
Lois: He-he just needs a little time.
[Many years later, when Peter's on his deathbed...]
Peter: Scott... I'm finally ready to hear the specials.

Brian: Where's Stewie.
Stewie: He ate me!
Peter: I ate him.
Billy Joel: He ate Stewie, Holy crap! Family Guy will be right back!

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