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| From the episode: | Extra Large Medium |
|---|---|
| Singers: | Stewie Griffin |
| Voices: | Seth MacFarlane |
"Down's Syndrome Girl" is a musical number sung by Stewie to Chris in order to prepare for his date with Ellen in "Extra Large Medium".
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Lyrics
- You've got to look your best tonight,
- You tubby little parasite,
- 'Cause there's a lovely lady and she's waiting for you.
- And though her pretty face may seem
- A special person's wettest dream
- Before you get to see it there are things you must do.
- We'll try a tie and boutonniere of yellow
- Or a rose that shows that you're a classy fellow
- With the posh panache of Jefferson at Monticello
- Busting out a mile with style.
- I know you just can't wait to stare
- At all that luscious orange hair
- But, boy, before you touch a single curl,
- You must impress that ultra bloomin',
- All-consumin', poorly groomin'
- Down's Syndrome girl.
- On any normal day you reek
- As if you're on a farting streak.
- Your finger's up your nose And you are dripping with drool.
- But if you want a lady's love,
- You're better off by smelling of
- A gentleman's cologne instead of sneakers and stool.
- A squirt, a spurt
- Of something just for Ellen
- And you'll see, that she
- Will find you so compellin'
- And she does, because
- The only smell that she'll be smellin'
- Won't be coming from your bum.
- [farts]
- You wanna take that little whore
- And spin her on the dancing floor,
- But boy, before you do a single twirl,
- You must impress that effervescing,
- Self-possessing, no BS-ing
- Down's Syndrome girl.
- Her eyes are emerald portals
- To a secret land of love
- And her smile is like the sweetest summer flower.
- Her kiss is so inviting
- And her hugs are so delighting,
- And what makes them really nice
- Is that they've got a little spice,
- Because they're tighter than a vise
- And they go on for an hour.
- [Stewie and Chris tap dance]
- My boy, between the two of us,
- We'll get you on that shorty bus
- And then you're gonna take it for a whirl.
- Now go impress that super-thrilling,
- Wish-fulfilling, Yoo-Hoo spilling,
- Ultra-swinging, boner-bringing,
- Gaily singing, dingalinging,
- Stupefying, fortifying,
- As of Monday, shoelace tying,
- Stimulating, titillating,
- Kitty-cat impersonating,
- Mega-rocking, pillow-talking,
- Just a little crooked walking,
- Coyly pouting, booby-sprouting:
- For some reason always shouting,
- Fascinating, captivating,
- Happiness and joy creating...
- [glass shatters]
- Down's Syndrome Girl!
Comic-Con Lyrics
When Seth MacFarlane performed the song live at Comic-Con 2010 which appears on the DVD set of Family Guy Volume 9, he sang the bridge with completely different lyrics. This version is also used on the DVD cut of the episode:
- Her eyes are emerald portals
- To a secret land of love
- And they seem to say we'll open just for Chris.
- They shine like sunny weather,
- And they're close enough together...
- That if they so desire
- They create a little fire,
- They could reach across the nose
- And give each other a kiss.