Television shows and films shown in Season 12
| Screenshot | What's on | Episode | Who's watching | Episode Order | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
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Eleven Angry Men and One Developmentally Disabled Man | Finders Keepers | Lois, Brian, Meg, Chris | 1 | |
| A holdout on a jury changes a trial. | |||||
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Family Guy | Finders Keepers | Old woman | 2 | |
| An old woman likes a cutaway, but not Peter's intrusion. | |||||
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Quantum Creep | Vestigial Peter | Stewie, Brian, Meg, Chris | 1 | |
| Sam arrives in 1972 and decides to show his penis to some kids. | |||||
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The Mikey Tony Magnanimous Hour | Vestigial Peter | Lois | 2 | |
| Mikey Tony presents real people being magnanimous about real things. | |||||
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Captain Central America | A Fistful of Meg | Peter | 1 | |
| A Latino superhero is created to paint a house. | |||||
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Kentucky Derby | A Fistful of Meg | Brian, Stewie | 2 | |
| Stewie cheers for the horse with the cutest name. | |||||
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Meg's sex tape | A Fistful of Meg | Stewie | 3 | |
| Meg tries to get expelled but only gets one watcher. | |||||
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BET E.T. | A Fistful of Meg | Brian | 4 | |
| E.T. is in no hurry to leave. | |||||
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Downton Syndrome | Boopa-Dee Bappa-Dee | Stewie, Brian, Meg, Chris | 1 | |
| The kids watch a UK "special". | |||||
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Italian Star Trek | Boopa-Dee Bappa-Dee | Peter | 2 | |
| Peter would rather stay in the hotel room in Italy and watch television. | |||||
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I Love Liquor | Life of Brian | Native American Griffin family | 1 | |
| Native American Stewie doesn't want to be bothered with Buffalo Brian due to watching television. | |||||
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Muppet Babies | In Harmony's Way | Griffin Family, Vinny, Rupert | 1 | |
| As Kermit the Frog expresses concern that Kermie Jr. isn't doing well, the half-pig/half-frog begs to be killed. | |||||
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Home Alone With Competent Robbers | Christmas Guy | Peter, Meg, Chris, Stewie, Vinny | 1 | |
| The crooks are not fooled by the traps. | |||||
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Miracle on 134th Street | Christmas Guy | Griffin Family | 1 | |
| A car owner is surprised that his belongings are intact. | |||||
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The Year Without a Santa Claus or Sex | Christmas Guy | Stewie | 3 | |
| A father is stressed during the holidays. | |||||
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Yule Log | Christmas Guy | Griffin Family | 4 | |
| The television plays the old standard on Christmas Day. | |||||
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A Streetcar Named Desire | Grimm Job | Peter, Lois | 1 | |
| Peter and Lois catch an early draft of A Streetcar Named Desire. | |||||
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Saving Private Ryan without commercial interruption | Brian's a Bad Father | Quagmire | 1 | |
| Quagmire watches a film edited for the sponsor, Mazda. | |||||
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The Love Boat With Somali Pirates | Brian's a Bad Father | Lois | 2 | |
| Captain Stubing discovers his job isn't so tough after all. | |||||
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S.T.: The Special Terrestrial | Mom's the Word | Joe, Quagmire | 1 | |
| The guys catch a film while while waiting for Peter at The Drunken Clam. | |||||
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The Price is Right | Mom's the Word | Evelyn | 2 | |
| Evelyn sneaks a peek at the television while kissing Peter. | |||||
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Big Bill Doyle | 3 Acts of God | Peter, Cleveland, Joe, Quagmire | 1 | |
| The guys catch John Wayne's final film with commentary. | |||||
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FOX NFL Postgame | 3 Acts of God | Peter, Cleveland, Joe, Quagmire | 2 | |
| The guys are annoyed when the Buffalo Bills players give God credit for their win over the New England Patriots. | |||||
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Animal voiceover | 3 Acts of God | Peter, Bill Belichick, Cleveland, Joe, Quagmire | 3 | |
| Peter tries to get a smile out of Bill Belichick by showing him an animal video he made with humorous voiceover. | |||||
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Backpacking Through Europe With a Bowlegged Man in Short-Shorts | Fresh Heir | Peter, Stewie, Brian | 1 | |
| A bowlegged backpacker has a grip on things. | |||||
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Mission Impossible V director's cut | Fresh Heir | Chris | 2 | |
| Chris watches the Mission Impossible V director's cut with the step-stools for Tom Cruise left in. | |||||
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At the Movies With Two Guys That Watch the Films on Their iPods | Fresh Heir | Joe, Quagmire | 3 | |
| The guys watch television at The Drunken Clam while waiting for Peter. | |||||
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Peter's anti-smoking commercial | Secondhand Spoke | Peter, Joe, Quagmire | 1 | |
| Peter shows off his anti-smoking commercial. | |||||
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VH1's Behind the Music | Herpe, the Love Sore | Peter, Lois | 1 | |
| Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem are featured. | |||||
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The Outlaw Josey Wales | Herpe, the Love Sore | Brian, Stewie | 2 | |
| Brian and Stewie watch a western. | |||||
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The Guy Who Lived In Between the Hatfields and the McCoys | Herpe, the Love Sore | Peter, Joe, Quagmire | 3 | |
| The guys watch The History Channel from the bar at The Drunken Clam. | |||||
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Bryan Cranston Sneezes | Herpe, the Love Sore | Stewie, Rupert | 4 | |
| Bryan earns another Emmy. | |||||
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"Dial Cross-Species" commercial | The Most Interesting Man in the World | Peter | 1 | |
| Peter sits though a commercial for a shampoo for dogs and humans. | |||||
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Superman | The Most Interesting Man in the World | Peter, Joe, Quagmire | 2 | |
| Superman's x-ray vision causes cancer in Lois Lane and the other women. | |||||
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The Karate Kid with realistic human feeling | The Most Interesting Man in the World | Joe, Quagmire | 3 | |
| Daniel has some choice words for Johnny. | |||||
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Wizard Robot and His Less Successful Friend | The Most Interesting Man in the World | Lois | 4 | |
| Lois sneaks some television. | |||||
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Hallmark Greeting Cards Explained | Baby Got Black | Peter, Lois, Meg, Brian, Stewie | 1 | |
| The family watches the Hallmark Channel. | |||||
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Boys | Baby Got Black | Peter | 2 | |
| Peter watches an HBO Original Movie. | |||||
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Extreme Makeover: Bethenny Frankel Edition | Meg Stinks! | Chris, Stewie | 1 | |
| The crowd shouts for the bus back. | |||||
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Jolly Farm Revue | Meg Stinks! | Chris, Stewie | 2 | |
| Chris and Stewie watch Jolly Farm Revue until Brian is sprayed by a skunk. | |||||
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The Gay Bachelor | He's Bla-ack! | Peter, Lois, Brian | 1 | |
| The bachelor chooses himself. | |||||
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Slightly Too-Early Comedy Club Audience Member | He's Bla-ack! | Peter | 2 | |
| A comedy club patron laughs before the punchline is delivered. | |||||
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The Incredible Hulk | Chap Stewie | Brian | 1 | |
| Brian watches a version of The Incredible Hulk starring Jeremy Piven. | |||||
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The Cadwalliders of Essex | Chap Stewie | Brian, Stewie, Rupert | 2 | |
| Stewie introduces Brian to a favorite show. | |||||